There is a statistic that I have heard which states that 1 out of every 4 people has struggled with depression at some point in their life. It is a very common mental illness and as such, it is likely that someone in your life has struggled with it or is currently struggling with it.
With that in mind, here are 10 things to know about depression:
1. Depression is no respecter of persons.
Depression strikes the old, young, rich, poor, fat, thin, those who are alone, those surrounded by loved ones, famous, unknown, every race, every religion (or lack of religion), and people of every conceivable creed. No one, by virtue of his/her status in life is necessarily immune from the possibility that they may suffer with this illness. Certainly, there are particular life situations which make depression less likely, but none are a guarantee.
Depression is a diagnosable illness and it is not the same thing as simply having a bad day. Depression is not just something you feel. Many people will say, "I am so depressed" or "I feel depressed" but in most cases, they are likely expressing that they are feeling very sad or are very upset about something. The difference is that when a person has Major Depressive Disorder (the diagnostic term for depression) feelings of sadness or being upset persist beyond a day or two.
Everyone experiences feelings of sadness from time to time and even intense sadness on occasion. When that sadness persists on a daily basis for longer than a couple of weeks and is accompanied by other symptoms, then it may be diagnosed as depression. Finally, since depression is an illness, it is advisable to seek a proper diagnosis from a doctor rather than trying to self-diagnose.
3. Depression has many faces.
When most people think of what a person struggling with depression looks like, invariably they picture -- even if only subconsciously -- someone who is constantly down in the mouth, sleeps all day, never laughs or smiles, and who is sort of a flat two-dimensional version of their normal self because they are so consumed by sadness. This may seem an exaggeration, but think about how depression is often characterized in literature, television, music, and movies.
The truth is, people who are struggling with depression experience every emotion that those without depression experience -- even joy and happiness. They may indeed have days or even weeks or months when they are very much as described above (those are some of the worst days), but even amidst these darker periods there are moments of light and normalcy.
4. People struggling with depression may hide their depression.
This goes along with number 3, in that, in these cases, depression definitely doesn't look like the stereotype. Many people who struggle with this illness tend to hide it from many of their friends, family, and others. The biggest reason for this is because, frankly, it is a hard thing to be honest about given the various stigmas and misunderstandings surrounding mental illness in our society. The biggest fear, I think, is that others might think you're crazy or dangerously unbalanced and that you will be ostracized or shunned for it. They may also be unwilling to admit to themselves that they are depressed or may be trying to self-medicate, in a way, by pretending everything is fine.
5. People struggling with depression do not necessarily need your unsolicited advice or suggestions.
I know. I know. People with depression need help. This is true and it is necessary for recovery; however, just because a person confides in you that they are struggling with depression, it does not also follow that they want or need your advice or ideas on how to get better. Certainly, if they ask for suggestions as to things that might help them or indicate that they could use your assistance with something pertaining to their treatment -- please be there for them if you are able to do so. Primarily, I want to discourage you from what I have noticed seems to be a knee jerk reaction I've experienced. Normally, it goes something like this:
Me: Yeah, I've been going through some depression for a while.
Person: Oh, I'm so sorry. I know that must be so hard.
Me: Yes, it really is.
Person: Have you ever tried medication for it?
Me: (brief pause as I try not to sigh audibly) Um, yes....several and several combinations and doses of medications. This isn't my first rodeo.
Person: Well, what about supplements? My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who tried Vitamin Q supplements and it really helped her depression.... (Big fat bonus points if you got the movie reference in the last sentence..)
Me: (suppressing another sigh) Um, yeah, I've heard that can be helpful.
I know people who offer these suggestions are only trying to be helpful, but it's such a common thing that it gets very trying, especially as none of these folks are actively involved in my treatment or even caregiving for me. If someone admits they're struggling with depression, please refrain from offering advice and just offer support by way of letting them know you are there for them. There are more practical ways to help, which I'll talk about in the next part of this post.
Very helpful post friend! Have you watched "Silver Linings Playbook" or read the book? I really liked it because I feel it is one of the most truthful depictions of what depression/bipolar etc are.
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